🌸愛と憎しみ🌸 – Ai to Nikushimi – Love & Hate

Author Note: Originally started and posted at tumblr. I discontinued this story and have moved it here to be archived with my other old stories.

Prequel Shaula/Tadayoshi – Part 1 of 2

Tadayoshi and Shaula had known each other their entire lives. She had a tendency of describing their relationship as love at first sight which he always categorically denied. They were opposites in things that mattered and stuff that didn’t.

Twenty-six years they had shared a life together and both would unequivocally say they loved each other just as much now as the day their relationship began.

For the two of them, today was nothing out of the ordinary. A quiet walk at their favorite spot in Okita. Alone time to enjoy each other’s company, “I have been thinking….”

He didn’t hesitate to interrupt her, “Every time you start doing that I end up someplace I don’t want to be.”

Stiflingly a soft laugh she quickly responded, “Yoshi, I know you secretly like it, but I was actually reflecting upon our sons. Don’t you think it is time we talk about ….”

A squeeze from his hand cut Shaula’s words short which gave him the opportunity to interject, “Yeah, let’s discuss those two. Our oldest is intelligent and successful, but afraid we will not accept that he is gay. The youngest has no ambition unless it comes to fighting and basketball.”

He could hear the tease in her tone long before he saw the mischievous look in her eyes, “It is cute how you always jump to conclusions regarding what I am thinking.”


Prequel Shaula/Tadayoshi – Part 2 of 2

Tadayoshi’s sigh was a combination of annoyance and resignation as he asked, “What have I misconstrued exactly?”

She didn’t answer his question, “It is alright to worry about them Yoshi. Zen will inform us when he is ready. As for Hiko, he just hasn’t found anything to keep him grounded. Give him time. I have a good feeling about this year.”

“Your head is in the clouds again, Shaula.”

A thoughtful sound escaped her lips before she responded, “Like you said Yoshi, Zen is intelligent and successful. He’s just afraid and Hiko likes fighting and basketball because they make him feel alive. Offer him challenges he doesn’t otherwise have. Someone will come along that will calm his wild ways.”

“I hate it when you seem so certain. As if thinking it will make it happen.”

Her head rested to his shoulder, “Didn’t this once simple girl subdue the heart of the bad boy?” There was no opportunity given for him to respond, “I think it is time we take the boys to meet their grandfather, Yoshi.”

The answer to what she had been thinking forced him to scoff, “Apparently, you have forgotten what happened the day I brought you home. The answer is no. Hell no!”


Prequel Zen/Hiko – Part 1 of 4

There was an eight year age difference between Zen and Hiko. The sons of Shaula and Tadayoshi put in effort to keep the distance caused by such a gap in check. It was not always easy. Their personalities were quite a bit different. Hiko was quick to temper and extremely frank while Zen was calm and down-to-earth.

“Mom said your grades suffered last year and that if they continue to decline you might need to get a tutor.” Hiko’s only response to his brothers words were a shrug, “It is not realistic to think that you are going to be able to handle a basketball for the rest of your life.”

“Still sound like dad,” Hiko stated then quickly continued, “You usually call when you’re coming home. So, why the unexpected visit?”

There was a moment of pensiveness before Zen offered an answer, “A friend of mine from high school has returned to Okita. Some of us decided to get together and welcome him back.”

“Huh…” The silence hung there a moment as Hiko chewed aggressively, “Is this a guy you took it from?”

“You’re a little shit you know that?” Zen responded before quickly adding, “No, he and I were never involved and for that matter, I don’t take it.”

“Did you want to be?” His question caused Zen some discomfort which he couldn’t hide. Thankfully, his brother continued, “So, you’re like the seme then?”

A naive inquiry that some people probably would have taken as insulting. Not Zen. He was well aware that Hiko meant no harm with his directness, “What the hell are you reading exactly?”

Hiko shrugged and answered between bites, “Mitsu’s sister says that is what a guy in yaoi is called when he is the top or something.”

Zen shook his head with an exhausted sigh, “You fucking kids need to get out more.”


Prequel Zen/Hiko – Part 2 of 4

Their lunch was typical. The back and forth was irritatingly fun, before being dominated by the eldest speaking about work and his relationship. Hiko asked questions and deflected answering any of his own.

Zen knew his brother well. The little signs that said something was wrong and the big ones that made it obvious that things were not going to end well for whatever was in his path.

Cautiously Zen broached the topic, “Are you going to tell me what is on your mind?”

Producing a pack of cigarettes from his pocket Hiko avoided the question by asking, “What does your boyfriend think about you coming all this way to hook up with some guy from your past?”

“You’re really persistent today.” Despite his words, there was no hesitation in responding to the question, “Kuro had a public appearance he could not get out of otherwise he would be here. More importantly, you should quit.”

“I’ll quit when you admit you’re the one taking it.”

“I fucking hate you.”

Hiko snorted which caught his brother off guard, “It is kind of funny having Mr. Perfect get all bent out of shape over taking dick. Have you told mom and dad yet?” The silence was telling. It answered the question without Zen saying a single word. “Why not?”

A deep sigh and resignation was all that Zen could manage. There was one thing that he and his little brother had in common. They were both very good at changing the topic, “Got a girlfriend yet?”

“Fuck you.”

Zen was slightly amused watching his brother shove his cigarettes back in his pocket, but then he started sulking and refused to speak. “Come on, I was just curious,” Zen placated.

“I’m not perfect like you,” The youngest son of Tadayoshi and Shaula snapped.


Prequel Zen/Hiko – Part 3 of 4

In a lot of ways his brothers words were not surprising because Hiko thought Zen always had it easy. Sometimes it required the eldest to handle his little brother with kid gloves, “I didn’t mean anything by it; just hoping you might tell me what is going on in your life after all we spend so much time talking about mine and we never get to yours.”

Hiko sighed deeply before hesitantly responding, “Girls just don’t like me.”

“Come on that can’t be true. There has to be some girls that are interested…”

Cutting his brother off, “Fine, they like me until I open my mouth.”

“Ah, that makes a lot of sense actually,” Zen stated casually which forced Hiko to a very sudden stop. An angry glare fell upon the eldest and gave little room for its meaning. Scrambling Zen added, “You are very blunt, Hiko. That is not a bad thing. It would be nice if people just said what they thought instead of tap-dancing around everything, but a little charm can go a long way. Tell a girl her hair looks nice…”

Scratching a spot on his cheek Hiko asked, “What if it doesn’t?”

Zen’s mouth opened and closed several times, “Lie.”

“That is terrible fucking advice,” Hiko stated as he began walking again.

An awkward laugh from Zen soon followed as he matched his brothers pace, “I never have this issue. Kuro always looks fantastic.”

Choking on his words Hiko barely managed to say, “I vomited a little in my mouth just now.”

“What, you suddenly have a problem with homosexuals?”

“No, just happy people,” Hiko responded and surprisingly continued, “It’s irritating, how some get everything they want. Never having to put in any effort and the rest of us are just trash. Doesn’t matter if we give a hundred percent or not because garbage is garbage. Some can fart shit and their groupies turn it into rainbows.”


Prequel Zen/Hiko – Part 4 of 4

Zen had tried to find the words to encourage his brother, but there was little opportunity to continue as a deep sigh escaped Hiko’s lips and he unexpectedly added, “I know I give you a lot of shit, but that is just because I don’t really get you and him.”

“I don’t need you to understand my being gay. I just want your acceptance.”

“Man you really are just like dad,” Hiko stated as he rested his hand upon the gate to their family home, “You’re my brother. I don’t care who you fuck, what I don’t understand is what the hell he sees in you. Kuro is kind of cool and your…well you.”

Zen chuckled as he turned on his heels, “Thanks, I think.”

“Not going to come in and visit for a bit?”

“Later,” Zen responded as he began walking.

Turning away from the gate, the youngest son of Shaula and Tadayoshi looked on as his brother faded into the distance. Just as Zen could tell something was wrong with Hiko, the same could be said for the reverse.


Moving In

“Is this how it is?” Tationy inquired which brought her brothers attention swiftly upon her. He could deny it, but it was obvious from where she was standing that he was attempting to escape the house. “You left me alone last night to do all the work and now you are doing it again. Well, have something to say for yourself?”

“When did you become the adult in this relationship?”

“The moment you abandoned me to put the house in order on my own. If you haven’t noticed I’m your sister, not your wife.”

Tatsuya sighed deeply before offering a response, “Forgive me Tationy, I have to check in at the precinct today and you know that I was out with friends last night…”

Quickly she interrupted him, “You could have taken me with you.”

”I doubt you would have enjoyed yourself around a bunch of drunk old guys trying to recapture their youth. Besides, they tend to get out of hand and it is hard enough keeping them out of jail. What kind of brother would I be if I put you in the middle of that?”

Tatsuya was difficult to read. His little sister had never seen him smile or laugh. Not once in her entire life. He was definitely not the type of person you could joke with or pester about the whys. So, there was little point in continuing their conversation because it was going nowhere.

Pouting as she turned on her heels Tationy responded, “You’re probably right.”


Moving In

She had taken only a single step upon the landing when Tatsuya called her name pulling her attention. It was a rarity for them to stand eye to eye because he generally towered over her. With the closed distanced, she didn’t know what to expect until his hand rested lightly upon her head, “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“I have asked a lot of you lately and you have given up so much without complaint. After I check in at work, I will stop to the store and get some groceries then come right home to help you unpack all these boxes.”

They seemed to be the right words, but she knew him well enough to know that the last part was just that. She was going to end up doing it all. “Wouldn’t it be better if you came home to get me so we could shop together. You don’t know what we need.”

“It’ll be alright. I think I can handle shopping for food and supplies without my wife.”

Tationy rolled her eyes as she stated, “Shopping for groceries isn’t like ordering takeout. Let me at least make you a list….”

“Have a little faith in your big brother, alright?”

Inwardly she sighed even though she acknowledged his words with a single nod of her head. She didn’t believe for a second that Tatsuya could accomplish this without messing it up. He was very good at dialing the phone to place an order, but he had never once stood in the kitchen and made a single thing.

“I’d better get going or I’ll be late checking in. Don’t work too hard,” He stated as he pulled away and added, “I left some money on the counter if you get hungry there is a little burger place down the road.”


Moving In

Just like that he was gone and Tationy was left wondering how she ended up here. Though the thought only lingered there for a moment. She knew the answer; Tatsuya was too smart for his own good.

After the death of their parents, Tationy moved in with her older brother. A cop in the investigation’s division of the Metropolitan Police Department. He loved his job, but that is really where all their problems started and ended.

Tatsuya was persistent. During one of his cases it became clear to him that a very important member of the ministers staff may have contributed financially to the death of a cabinet official. He wouldn’t let it go even when the higher ups told him to.

It was career suicide which ultimately led to him being transferred out of the investigation’s division for a less than prestigious job in records. It hurt them; financially and socially.

Tatsuya had been looking for a way back into investigations ever since and that was ultimately how they ended up in Okita. It was not the criminal unit of a major metropolis, but it was an opportunity. One he couldn’t afford to pass up and Tationy got dragged along for the ride.

“Why did I get stuck with such an unreliable big brother?” She questioned to herself as she maneuvered around the single family home they had rented. It wasn’t a step up from where they came from, but the neighborhood seemed quiet enough.

“Thank you, Tationy. I’m sorry, Tationy.” The words were grumbled in a mocking manner over and over again before she sighed deeply as she thought to herself, “He should be grateful I don’t complain because he deserves an earful.”